Catapult is proud to announce the release of it's new CoWorkerator program, the aptly named AllJoyHereNowAndCoffeeFuture! They are calling it AJHNACF! for short. (Pronounced ah-june-ack-fuh.)
"We are so excited to announce AJHNACF!" Said April Lane, Catapult's Executive Director. "We know a few things better than anyone else in this space. Namely, shared real estate, (which is going to be HUGE), good coffee, predicting the future, and facilitating a safe space where passionate people can get together and create collaborative synergies related to the aforementioned topics."
When asked for her opinion on the new AJHNACF! initiative, Michelle Soble, Marketing Director at Catapult, just shouted, "yolo!" and then hung up the phone.
"The thing we are most excited about is the coffee itself." Ryan Leavitt, Catapult co-founder said. "We are proud to announce that we will be roasting the beans in house, directly on top of our overburdened and overheating network servers." When asked if he was worried that it might have a negative impact on internet connectivity, Leavitt brushed off the question and said, "have you ever smelled fresh roasted coffee beans? Totally worth it."
"Unlike other greedy accelerators, AJHNACF! only takes six percent equity. And the best part is, if you agree to advertise our coffee on your company's homepage, we only take four percent. Isn't that awesome?!" Exclaimed Galen Mason, another Catapult co-founder, and the brains behind AJHNACF!
Mason, whose level of excitement about AJHNACF! is so high that he seems like a golden retriever who is seeing his owner for the first time in a week, continued, "AJHNACF! will go far beyond coffee and coworking hubs. This is going to be Chicago's premiere space to learn about office hours, skinny jeans, rigid denim skinny jeans, data-driving your data-dumps, MVPs, twitter, 2013 twitter, deep twitter, integrating the blogosphere, and what's most likely to come after burning man."
If AJHNACF! is actually going to be all that the Catapult founders say it is, this is a really exciting time to be a coffee and coworking fan in Chicago. Stay tuned to this space for updates.